Extermination #2

Tomorrow is extermination #2, and our "last" scheduled treatment. I am doubtful that the second treatment will be the final one. We have caught more than 50 since the first extermination. That, to me, is not a decrease in activity. I am fully expecting to have to get a third treatment. I found another live one today. I had a pile of beach towels on our heater (we have the tall cast iron coil radiators) that I hadn't gotten around to putting away. As I was doing that task today, I found one. So all of them now have to be washed and dried on HOT! Then I will pack them away. The most frustrating thing to me is that everything I have read says these bugs want to be close to a host and will come out to feed at least every three to five days. Our bugs aren't following the rules!! I have found some in the most unlikely places and it makes me nervous that some of these will be left behind and not die. I would never have imagined treating my coupon bag or the pile of towels. IT IS FRUSTRATING!! What ones am I missing? It is really making me crazy. Please pray as we get exterminated, that it would be effective and that we would not miss any. Please pray that the evil little creatures will come out from hiding and DIE!!!

Do bedbugs...

take the weekends off? After a horrendous Tuesday and Wednesday and a few on Thursday, we really haven't found anymore. I think Andy found one today. It was this way last weekend, too. We are all getting quite tired of the routine of plastic bags, things packed away, and no Christmas decorations (except for our Charlie Brown Christmas Tree!). The kids are starting to get grumpy about the whole situation. Which tends to make parents grumpy. Please pray that this will end soon. As of right now, declaration day is January 26th. That seems like an eternity away. I am hoping we can hold out that long before going bonkers!

Yesterday and today I have been deep cleaning the kitchen. I have pulled everything out of the cupboards, all the baskets down, and pulled everything off the shelves and cleaned. I also decided which Longaberger baskets I will be getting rid of and thinking of how to scale our personal inventory down. I am REALLY trying to become a minimalist! Not such an easy task. I didn't even go out for Black Friday. I am trying so hard not to buy things that we just don't need. I double and triple think on every purchase. I am also hoping that this will help with our bottom line. Not that we were very frivolous, but I wouldn't think twice about purchasing a book for the kids, or an educational toy. But now I am taking advantage of the library more and seeing if friends have the educational item to borrow. I think the scaling down will take quite a while, but I feel good with what I've accomplished today. The only reason I am thankful for bedbugs is the whole push to down-size life!

Wanna see?

I decorated for Christmas when we got home from our Thanksgiving festivities. Here it is....

I am unsure if we will do any decorating this year while dealing with bedbugs. I can't risk packing one away only to resurface next year. We'll see.

Thanksgiving 2008

Like Daniel's shirt? That's how I feel right now!Our decision to stay home instead of sleeping at the Schultz' proved to be a wise one as we caught many bugs again. It was unreal. A few of them were little. I was up until 3:00 am, then could no longer take it and crashed into bed. I even found one before we left this morning. I left the house praying that God would protect our house and not let them invade.

We left the house around 10:30 am and at the last minute I grabbed my coupon bag. It takes about 1 1/2 hours to get up there and I like to do something while in the car, so I decided to clip some coupons. I was happily clipping when I pulled out a grouping and there it was....a small bed bug. I thought I was going to lose it. I was so upset. I made Andy pull over and I immediately dispatched it, first squishing it and then opening the door and escorting it out of the car. Panic mode set in. Here we were, going to my favorite place in the world, and there was a bedbug tagging along. UGH!!!!! We were only a short distance away from the Schultz' and as soon as we got there I unloaded the entire bag and found another. Andy went and got some Ziploc bags and I bagged all my coupons and the bag I carry them in. We checked all the kids thoroughly as well as ourselves and then entered the house. Andy's parents are so wonderful. I only had one minor melt-down and they tried to reassure me that this would end someday. I am so tired of dealing with these beasts. I am starting to become extremely doubtful that this will ever end. There are days when I feel like this is how life is going to be from now on. I am losing hope. Nothing is safe from these bugs and we keep finding more. All I keep asking is "When will this end? What point is there to this trial? Why must it go on so long?" I know I can do all things through His strength, but I am tired. My house is a wreck, my kids are not being focused upon causing them to go hey wire, school is suffering, and I can't sleep. Please pray that I would trust God to do what is best. If that means more bugs, then pray for the strength to handle it.

We went to my mom's house after the Schultz', where we celebrated Thanksgiving #2. We had fun there, too, stuffing ourselves with more great food. I don't believe Weight Watchers will go well this week! I'll have to exercise double for the next five days in hopes of breaking even!

All day I have been concerned about the bugs overtaking the house while we were gone. We haven't seen any yet. Andy is touring as I type and I am praying he doesn't find any. I can't wait until Monday when the exterminators come again. Please pray they bring something stronger that will put an end to these retched things.

New Look!

Do you like the new look? I LOVE it! I didn't have any idea how it would look as my incredibly talented webmaster friend, Carisa, did it for me as a surprise! She is so cool! It is so nice to have friends that know how to do these things as my brain is just not able to comprehend these things! THANK YOU, CARISA!!!!

We decided not to risk our house, or Andy's parents, to bugs. So we will be heading up to Schultz farm in the morning and enjoying a Thanksgiving lunch and then we will head to my folks to have a Thanksgiving dinner. I am trying to plan what I will eat ahead of time so as not to overdue it! I was disappointed this week as I gained 2 pounds. Not planning meals and lack of exercise has done it's damage. I am back on the horse and am writing everything down and will get back to exercising this Saturday. I am done focusing my life around 1/4 inch bugs. I need to get back into a normal routine and life as it once was.

Now it's off to make pumpkin pies! I so love pumpkin pie! So do Matt and Sarah! I hope and pray everyone has a safe and Happy Thanksgiving!

The Battle Continues

After beginning to feel comfortable over the weekend we have had a resurgence of the nasty bedbugs. It is completely frustrating. Last night alone we caught 10 more. It makes us worried about our plans for today. We were to go up to Andy's parents and spend the night, but we are concerned that if we are not here we will be overrun by tomorrow night. We are frustrated because the exterminators told us it takes 7-10 days for the pesticides to take effect. Today is day 9 and there is an increase in pests, not a decrease! It makes me worried about what the house next door must look like.

I was really looking forward to getting a good nights sleep tonight. But I guess that will have to wait for another time. Someday this WILL be over. Someday my house will be back in order. Someday

UGH! Starting the count over!

Yes, I found a live one last night, actually early this morning, around 1:00 am. It was on the carpet in the boys room. It was a little one, too. I am disgusted. I am really hoping that it didn't hatch over here. I am praying that we, or the exterminators, haven't missed a nest somewhere. I thought we were on the rebound and would soon be able to get life back to normal. I was even contemplating getting out some Christmas lights this weekend and doing a little decorating, but now I really don't know what to do. I guess we'll just wait and see. December 1st can't come soon enough! Please pray with me that the second extermination renders ALL bedbugs incapacitated permanently! The new date for declaring our house bug free is January 20th. It seems like an eternity until then. The day will come when we are bug free. I just have to be patient and wait on the Lord. Waiting is NOT one of my strong points!

Please continue to pray for the Hinson family. Frank is scheduled for surgery December 2, 2008. It is a 6-12 hour surgery. Please pray for the kids, especially, as this is proving to be a bit difficult for them, being shuffled from caregiver to caregiver. Kids thrive on routine and their lives have been anything but routine as of late. Please pray for Frank and Carisa as they make some other decisions about their family and the surgery.

Day Two

So far, so good. I am not willing to say they are completely gone as I am afraid it will jinx the whole thing. It's been two days since we have seen a bug. Tomorrow I will be changing sheets and carefully inspecting the beds. I truly hope I don't find one. I am just now letting myself get comfortable in my house. I am hoping that by January 15th, 55 days from yesterday, I can put my house back together and forget this whole incident occurred.

The message in church today was one I really needed to hear. The title of the sermon was "Ungrateful". It really got me thinking about my ungratefulness. I was/am incredibly ungrateful about this entire situation, not really even thanking God for the fact that we caught it early. I just didn't want to deal with the trial at all. How selfish of me to think I should be spared trials that are hard! I was humbled today to be thankful for trials that stretch me to the point of submission to God's will, not my own. This whole experience has opened my eyes to the fact that I still struggle with being here in Philly. I thought I had gotten past that. I thought I had given myself fully to being apart of this ministry and supporting Andy in all he is doing here. I was wrong. I am still fighting God's will for me and my family. I have no desire to be here, but I am thankful that God is still working in my heart and life. I am also thankful for the bugs as it has allowed me to evaluate life here in Philly and what needs to change in my life and how to go about changing.

Tomorrow Andy is speaking at Salem Christian School's chapel. We will all be heading up there with him. We will then visit with Andy's parents for a short time and head home. I had really wanted to get back into the swing of things this week, but it looks like that will have to wait until December 1st. We aren't as far behind as I thought we were, so I think we'll be okay. Yes, we'll still have school to finish when we get back from vacation in May (I had planned it so we would be completed), but we have until June 30th to finish the year. Life happens! We will get through.

Thanks for praying for our situation. Please continue to pray as we are still a bit on edge and trying not to get too hopeful, too fast! Please pray that we will be patient and wait for God's timing for the whole situation.

One day at a time....

Today was the first day in about three weeks we have not found a bedbug. I do not know whether to rejoice or be nervous. My mind is thinking "Yes! Finally!", but my heart is thinking "They are hiding and we are never going to get rid of these little beasts." My prayer has been that if the poison isn't working that God would allow the bugs to be seen and we would find them. We continue to do hourly rounds, looking at the ceiling where we believe is their main entrance, looking up the stairs, looking in each kids bedroom, in the hall and into our bedroom. This is something we started three weeks ago in our effort to find the bugs before they found a home to nest. I am taking each day as it comes and truly hoping that this is coming to an end.

I didn't sleep well at all last night, maybe getting two hours of sleep. Between being anxious about the bugs as well as my husband at the all-niter, proved more than my brain could handle. I then got up early to take the kids out to breakfast with my mom so that Andy could have some peace and get some much needed sleep. We then went to the King of Prussia Mall. The kids were thrilled as they have just opened a new Lego store. It was pretty cool - so many different Lego sets. The kids each had money saved and they each purchased a new Lego set. They should keep them occupied for a couple of hours anyway. I was able to finish up some Christmas shopping and enjoy a great day with my mom. It felt good to relax and not stress over these ridiculous bugs.

Andy had a great all-niter. A total of 64 people ended up going. The kids had a great time bowling from 12-3 am and then they all went back to the church and played either "Extreme Dodge ball" or watched a movie, "Prince of Egypt". Andy had fun, and slept until 2:00pm! Tomorrow will be my nap time!

I was....

starting to relax about this whole bedbug thing as we had found only three today, one was dead, and two were mostly dead (they had a little life left in them). Then I found an incredibly active one on the sofa!!!! I so hate these creatures. I am having a hard time thinking how these creatures could bring glory to God.

We called the exterminator and asked why were finding so many. He explained the stuff they use is something that the bedbugs take back to their nest and infect the nest, hopefully rendering them all incapacitated. This was not something I had read about. I am going to research some more and see if they can't just lay down the poison that kills. He said it would be normal to see activity for up to 10 days after the treatment. They will come December 1st and do the entire treatment again. As far as a third treatment, if they see any activity next door they will come over and treat our house automatically. If they don't but we see bugs, we are to call them and they will come and do a third treatment.

Last night was horrible as I confused my poor husband out of his mind. I had gone to bed thinking about these wicked creatures and inevitably dreamed about them. Sarah had come in and woke me up enough so that I was in the in-between state of dream and awake. I started hitting Andy and telling him there was a bug under the bed. I was panicked and he went to get the flashlight to look under the bed, all the time thinking "How can she see under the bed?" I finally realized that I was dreaming. Daniel then came in and decided that he needed to sleep in our bed. It was an interesting night. Poor Andy though. He has a nutcase for a wife!

Andy has his Teen Club All-Nighter tonight. Who knows how much sleep I'll get. If I'm not sleeping well with the bugs, I know I won't sleep well without him here. He'll be home at about 5:30 am. I guess I'll be pulling an all-nighter as well! Pray for their safety.

It's only....

1:30 pm and I have already found 6 bedbugs. Only one of them was dead. I had hoped that the pesticides they sprayed on Monday would have started working by now and that I would only be finding bug corpses instead of wriggly legs. I am going to call the exterminator and ask when we should start being concerned. When they were here they said we should start seeing a decrease in activity almost immediately. Since Monday we have found 20 bugs. I don't consider that a decrease in activity. Another issue that has me concerned is the fact that we are getting two treatments, while the house next door is getting three. My fear is if there is no third treatment here, then anything alive over there will travel over here, with nothing to prevent it from doing so. I am going to e-mail COMAR and ask them to consider giving us a third treatment as well, so that I will have more peace of mind. If they do not I am going to ask Ehrlich how much the third treatment will cost and probably pay for it. It will be worth it for my peace of mind.

Phantom Itches

I have been experiencing these all day. I am the point where I am almost terrified of leaving the house for fear I will take one of these dreadful beasts outside and infect some other poor soul. But I had to go to my ABC class (diabetic class) tonight and also to Weight Watchers to get weighed in. The whole time I was out I was nervous one would craw out of my clothing and everyone would scream and go into hysteria. I know it is utterly ridiculous the path at which my thoughts are traveling, but I so do not want to be the reason for someone else having to deal with this horrific situation.

Andy ran up to his parents house today to spray their house for bedbugs, as a safety precaution. I am not sure we have infested them, but we are taking no chances. I have no idea how we will handle Thanksgiving. We usually sleep over, but I am a bit freaked out that there may be a chance of having a hitchhiker. Yesterday, I caught eight of the little beasts. Today it is four (so far). I am so ready for these beasts to be gone. Can you tell I'm tired of the little devils?

I am not the only one dealing with desiring life to go back to the way it was. I would really appreciate it if you could pray for the Hinson family. Frank and Carisa moved here to Philly on March 5, 2002. They have been an incredible asset to our team, not to mention a great source of joy to Andy and I. They are great friends and really help us in so many ways. November 3rd, Frank went to the hospital in pain. He had surgery November 4th, in which they removed a kiwi sized tumor. He has since been diagnosed with testicular cancer. He is currently awaiting blood test results to see if the cancer has spread to his abdominal lymph nodes. If it hasn't invaded he will likely have surgery to remove the lymph nodes. If it has invaded he will have to undergo chemotherapy. Something he does not desire to do. Please pray with us that it will not have spread and he can remove the lymph nodes before they become infected. Please pray for the whole family as they deal with this horrible disease. Their boys are 6 and 2 years old and don't fully comprehend everything that is going on. They just want their daddy to be like he was. Thanks for praying.

And now...

the car won't start. There goes $450. We just got it back last Thursday. I know God is teaching us something.

High and Low

Yesterday was E-day, extermination day. Sunday evening we took the kids up to Andy's parents to spend the night and then we came home and started packing everything from the closets and bookshelves, so that the exterminators could spray everything. I was up until 6:00 am. I slept until 8:30 am and the exterminators were here at 9:15 am. A crew of three men came in and started steaming the mattresses and spraying insecticide along all the baseboards and ceilings. They also dusted all the electrical outlets and light switches. Their was good news. They found no "nests" or clusters of bed bugs. The only one they did find was between Andy's and my box springs (we have a king size bed with twin box springs underneath. They treated the box springs well and also the furniture downstairs. I was really beginning to feel good about the entire situation. There was light at the end of this horrendously dark tunnel.

After the exterminators were done, I went up to pick up the kids. I stayed for about an hour and then gathered their things (very limited in what they took and all clothes were in a sealed plastic bag). We hit a few stores on the way home, including Atlantic Book Warehouse. The one on rt. 309 is closing and they were having a sale. I went in telling the kids were weren't going to buy just because it was on sale. We would look. The books were only 25% off so the sale wasn't great. But while I was looking I found this:

It was just lying there innocently on a pile of books! I have been looking for this book for 6 years! It is out of print and people on http://www.half.com/ want $25-$55 for the thing! And they are ex-library copies! I only paid $4.75! I have needed it to almost complete the books needed for Before Five in a Row. I now only need Yellow Ball. I did the program with Sarah when she was three and was hoping to start the program with Daniel in January. Yellow Ball is a book available at our library, but My Blue Boat is something I had to borrow from a Florida library last time! I was on cloud nine....until I came home.

I was putting the kids to bed when Matt said his elbow itched and upon closer inspection they looked like bug bites. I immediately went into panic mode when he said they had started itching THAT MORNING! He woke up at his grandparent that morning. Had I not been cautious enough when taking them up there? I immediately called Andy's parents and asked them to bag up all the bedding. Lois said she would put it outside until she could get to it. She has an insane work schedule this week. After getting the kids in bed, I started putting everything into a bag to take downstairs to wash when I found a little beast on Sarah's jacket. That was all it took for Satan to take control of my thinking, throw me into a pit of despair, and become depressed with the possibility that I had infested my in-laws house with bed bugs. I called them up crying and apologizing for what I may have done. I am still crying. After feeling so good about the situation, I am back into obsession mode. I am consumed with the thought of bed bugs. I am weary to the point of tears. I think it has hit me so hard because I view Andy's parents home as a safe haven. A place of refuge from all that is ugly in this city. A place I can go and feel welcome and loved and secure in the midst of this chaotic life. I do not want these little beasts to invade my place of refuge. They have already invaded my thoughts and home.

Lois and John are two of God's greatest blessings in my life. It is killing me inside to think I may have brought this plague upon them. Please pray with me that there are NO bed bugs up at the Schultz'. Please pray for me to really trust God in this situation. I am still struggling with the why of this whole situation. I just want this to be done and be able to live comfortably in my own house without fear and worry.

E-day

Tomorrow is E-day - extermination, evacuation day! I am so ready. Well, not really ready for the actual event as there is still much to do. I am ready for these little devils to be gone! Please pray with us that this extermination will be successful and that we can stop hunting down the little buggers. Please pray that we can get back into some kind of "normal" routine. School has suffered greatly. The kids have suffered from lack of discipline and schedule. They are currently up at Andy's parent to spend the night. Andy really wanted me here during the extermination procedure so we could both know what they were doing and I could state EXACTLY what I want done. I have done a lot of reading on these pests and know that certain things NEED to be done to have a successful evacuation. Please pray that I would stand up for what needs to be done, but at the same time be loving and kind. I tend to get a little over zealous and my red-headed temper shines through! I am nervous about this whole thing. I just so want this to work and for this trial to be over. I know God is in control. I only hope I have learned the lessons I needed to learn (I will post more on this tomorrow) and we can move on.

Good News!

Yes, there is some, finally! Our van is back home! After not having it for more than two months I cannot describe how freeing it felt to be able to hop into the car and go where I needed to go! My husband's only fear was that I would not be returning! If it had been last week he may have been correct in that fear. But I am beginning to handle things better. I haven't cried for two days. My brain is finally realizing that this will go away. It may take awhile, but these bugs will be gone if we are vigilant in our fight with them.

I think the turning point in my thinking was purchasing these:

I know it seems crazy, but after I purchased these (over $100.00!) I felt like I had a plan of attack. Before, everything seemed so overwhelming. I now know what I have to do and follow the plan until we are completely sure we are bug free. How long is that? From what I have read I can't be sure until 55 days after the last bite or sighting. Females can live up to and sometime over 18 months, but if there is a food source, they will come out and eat. They prefer to eat every three to five days. I am praying that we can begin counting around December 1st as that is the second date of extermination.

I have been learning many lessons through this. Namely, I don't need things. I like things, but the things were starting to make me weary. They were taking a lot of time to keep up. I didn't realize how much time, until now. Time I should have been spending with my family, and more importantly, with my Father. I am feeling much better about this trial. Please pray with me that I will continue to put into practice all those things that I have learned and not get lazy and fall back into old habits.

1,2,3,4,5....

That's how many bugs I have found today. Tonight there were three on Sarah's bedroom floor. I fear that they have found a new entry point that we don't know about. I keep praying that God is keeping my eyes wide open to spot them BEFORE they do any propagating. I am so ready for them to be gone. I am so ready to stop looking at everything and inspecting it for bugs. I honestly don't believe I will ever be the same person again. Paranoia has set in and it's to the point where everything looks like a bug. Please pray with me that these nasty little creatures will not have laid any eggs and if they have that the exterminators will have gotten every last one of them. Please pray that COMAR has done the right thing and thrown every last stitch of furniture out of the house next door and that all new things will be brought in when they decide to put people back into the house. Please pray that I will be able to get through this without going stark raving mad!

Pray for the kids as they are starting to feel the effects of mommy's craziness. I have not been able to truly focus on their education or spend any quality time with Daniel. Please pray that life would be able to return to normal in the next few weeks.

Sleep Tight.....

Yeah, that is the funny saying in our house right now. At least the kids think it's funny. I would just be thankful for some sleep. I have not been sleeping, but trying to go through EVERYTHING and packing it up to be stored away for the next two years. I am learning daily that life is not about things. I never thought it was, but things sure were nice. Now I don't want anything to come into this house. After the stuff is in storage for two years we won't even know what we are missing. And hopefully all the bugs will be DEAD. I have wanted to go through our things and s-l-o-w-l-y get rid of items. Now I am being forced to do so. I know in the end I will be incredibly thankful for these little devils as my house will be eliminated of all clutter and I will think two, three, or even four times before purchasing something to bring into the house. The hardest part of all this is the kids things. They are mourning losing our things. But I think this is going to be such a good lesson for them to learn - hard but good. Daniel is already being such a trooper! He and I took a huge box of toys (all cleaned and clear of bugs) to St. Christopher's Hospital on Monday. He was so pleased with himself. I was pleased even more with his generosity. He understood perfectly what he was doing and really wanted to do it!

I am desperately trying to be thankful in all things. There are many times throughout the day in which depression and discouragement settle in and start taking over my thinking. But I am trying to think positively - that one day these bugs will be gone and I will sleep again.

Extermination is set for Monday. COMAR wants us to sign a wavier form before they give the go ahead. We are uncomfortable with signing it as everything I have read says it takes 2-4 exterminations to rid a residence of these bugs. Andy talked with a laywer and wrote up something he is comfortable signing, but we haven't heard whether or not they are going to accept it or not. Please pray that we have caught the bugs early enough that the first extermination with get rid of them all! Otherwise I guess we'll be paying for a 2nd, and possibly third or fourth extermination.

Answers

I am looking for some. I am still struggling with the mess that is my life right now. I am at the point where I am just angry. I am so tired of always looking for bed bugs, tired of cleaning EVERYTHING everyday, tired of not being able to do life "normally". Just when I think we have a handle on this bug thing, things get worse. Tonight, as I gave Daniel a bath, this is what his poor body looked like.

Apparently, he had a guest during nap time and this is what he was left with. I changed his sheets, steamed his bed frame again, and made sure everything was sealed. It is so frustrating. I feel so bad for my boy and his itchy body. The good news from today, however, is that COMAR has agreed to pay for our house to be fumigated along with their house. Hopefully this will take place sometime this week. Please pray that this will be the end. I have been reading horror stories on line of people dealing with these dreadful creatures for up to three years!!!! I will not do that. I will toss everything into a pile and burn it before I deal with them that long. Well, it's off to pack more things away.

Unbelievable

If you haven't read the below post, Struggling, read that first to understand this one.

Last night was unbelievable, unless you were living through it. As I was getting ready to go upstairs to head to bed after a VERY long day dealing with bed bugs, I happened to look at the entertainment center a certain way and spied a bed bug. It was definitely God showing me this bug because they are almost the same exact coloring of the entertainment center (reddish-brown). There was also a white plastic bin sitting on top of the stereo speaker that holds Daniel's V-smile game. I found SIX in that bin! I then pulled the speaker away from the wall and found several more along the baseboard, wall, and carpet. We thought they were coming from the baseboard. As we looked up towards the drop ceiling, however, that is where we found MORE!!!! They are coming in through some kind of hole between our house the house next door in the ceiling. I was up until 4:15 am spying them and trapping them with tape. We are keeping them as evidence that we are getting them. We must have caught about 40 of them. And that is only what we saw. I can't even begin to imagine what the house will look like in just a week or so if something is not done.

As I suspected, they are migrating. I am not up for the task tonight. If more come how are we ever going to get rid of them? What about Christmas decorating? I can't pull things out knowing they may get packed up again with bugs on them. We have plans to call the health department tomorrow as COMAR is a business and has a responsibility to keep their facilities clean and bug free. I have no idea what they will do. As of right now I am going through each item we have and packing it away. We will be taking it out of the house. We are going bear bones. The entertainment center is getting tossed in the trash tomorrow. The fireplace will not get put in until this issue is resolved. Thankfully our house is still a comfortable 72 degrees and we haven't had to turn the oil heat on. This whole thing has just been such a mess. I am still struggling, but know that it was God that pointed out what we thing is the entry point to these little beasts. PLEASE PRAY that we will be able to eradicate them QUICKLY. Before they start laying eggs.

Struggling

In one word, that is where I am. Emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually. I am tired. I feel like I did 14 1/2 years ago when we moved here to Philly. I DO NOT WANT TO BE HERE! When we first moved here it was for a two year internship. Honestly, it was that hope of only being here two years that kept me going. Well, obviously, we decided that God wanted us to stay. So, stay we did. But these past four months have been a struggle for me. July was the car problem which is still unresolved. We have been without a car for two months. August was the water pipe leading to the street costing us over $3000. September was finding out my triglycerides were through the roof and I have type 2 diabetes. This past Monday was finding out a dear friend and co-worker has cancer and what it is doing to their precious family. This past Wednesday was finding out that our neighbors, a COMAR house, is infested with bed bugs. We have since found them in our house. I have spent the past three days washing, cleaning, washing, steaming, washing....you get the picture. COMAR sent an exterminator to the house yesterday and they recommended a full treatment which will cost $1000-$1200. COMAR has not said they would pay for it. COMAR has moved the two women from the house next door and is now gutting the house. This will cause two problems. The bed bugs will no longer be able to hide and they now have no hosts on which to feed. Meaning they will travel to find hosts. Which means they will travel over here where there are five fresh hosts to be had. I am overwhelmed. Even after all the cleaning and steaming (it is the only thing that will kill eggs if they are laid), we still found two live bed bugs. I have heard stories of how difficult they are to get rid of. I am not up for the battle. What if we never get rid of them? I cannot spend 24/7 cleaning and searching for bed bugs.

Homeschooling has already suffered greatly this past week with Matt only getting 5 math lessons and 1 English lesson completed. With all that has been going on his focus has been completely lost. Thankfully, Sarah has managed to keep up. I am at a loss as how to handle everything. I understand God is in control and has a purpose and a plan for all things, but I honestly cannot fathom what purpose and plan there is in having bed bugs. So, there is my life. I keep thinking that many of the above issues would never had happened had we not lived here. I know that my thinking should not be following this path. I know that Satan is getting a good stronghold on my emotions and thinking. I am struggling. I don't know how to pray as I just really want to go home and Philly currently does not feel like home. Please pray for us all as we deal with things. Pray specifically that my heart would be changed and I will once again feel the love and desire to live where God has called us to live.